Before I go running anywhere, I’ve got to stand and observe how this plays out. Listen folks, things are not normal. Things are not going back to normal.
Mother’s Day Giveaway
As a mama of 6 I know what it’s like to feel like the work you do goes unnoticed. I know what it’s like to feel undervalued. I want you to know I see you and I care.
10 Practical Ways To Manage Stress
April was National Stress Awareness Month and in May we recognize Mental Health Month. And in light of our current global crisis, it is critical that we proactively protect our minds and our emotions. Stress can certainly be a huge contributor to ebbing away at our mental health so we want to do what we can to get the help we need.
Let’s face it, if you are a human being, living on this planet, at some point you will come face to face with stress. We will all come to the place where life’s demands exceed our bandwidth, reaching beyond our capacity to handle. And that’s the place where we can begin to feel stress.
In and of itself, stress is not such a bad thing. God hardwired this response into every human. From the dawn of humanity until now, this automatic response mechanism has protected us from imminent danger. From warding off an animal attack hundreds of years ago to quickly stepping on the brakes to avoid a car crash today, stress gives way to the release of hormones enabling our bodies to jump into protective mode.
It becomes problematic though when our bodies are constantly operating from the protective mode. While we cannot control all the stressors that life presents but we can control our responses to them.
You will manage stress, stress won’t manage you.
10 Practical Ways To Manage Stress
You don’t have to do all of them at once. Perhaps you can adopt one a day or practice one a week until they are ingrained and become part of your regular wellness protocol. Employing the following practices has personally helped me heal from past trauma, manage the demands of caring for a large family while serving my community, grow as a disciple of God and effectively handle the pressures of life.
Mindfulness
Be transformed by renewal of the mind (Romans 12:2). Be purposeful in thinking about the things you think about. When your thoughts are pulled away by worry, fear, and anxiety, cast those down and shift your thoughts to those that are excellent and praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8).
Meditation
Think deeply on God’s word. Day and night meditate on His precepts. Ponder on His goodness and faithfulness. The Psalms encourage us again and again to meditate day and night.
Laughter
Sometimes I envy my husband. Laughter comes easily to him. I tend to be more serious and can get consumed by what needs to be done and that has a way of squeezing out laughter. A cheerful heart is good medicine (Proverbs 17:22) so take a dose of laughter so that you stay well.
Sun Therapy
Light therapy, also known as heliotherapy has been used for ages to heal people. From skin disorders to depression, studies have proven the sun’s ability to heal. So when possible, get outdoors and soak up the sun. It will work wonders to calm your nerves and boost your mood. Arise, shine for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord rises upon you Isaiah 60:1
Deep Breathing
While you’re out there in the sun, breath deeply. Deep breathing calms your nervous system, releases serotonin, and increases your oxygen intake causing you to lower your heart rate, lower your blood pressure and exhale toxins. This is a powerful way to bring about relaxation and peace.
Essential Oils
One of the things that you can breathe deeply is essential oils. Coupling oils with the above practices supercharges their effectiveness. Since the beginning of time, plants and herbs have been used to heal mankind. The bible tells us in Revelation 22:2, the leaves on the trees are for the healing of the nations. Essential oils like Clary Sage and Lavender promote relaxation and boost hope.
Sleep
Have you ever experienced the rejuvenating power of a good night’s sleep? Review your sleep hygiene practices. Are you creating an atmosphere conducive for a good night’s rest? Limiting electronics, bathing before bed, using Lavender essential oil and prayer are all practices that can aid you in having a better night’s sleep. Your brain has A LOT of work to do in cataloging all the work you’ve done for the day so you’ve got to get some good sleep. Sleep affects for daily performance and even your weight so go to bed!
Exercise
On the other side of sleep is movement. Exercise is an effective way to release endorphins promoting a release of stress and inviting in feel good emotions. So move that body and get your happy on. Exercise isn’t my favorite thing to do but I know it’s good for me so I make it a priority. I’m not saying you’ve got to be a super athlete but I am suggesting that you get that blood flowing, get that heart stimulated and move.
Eating Right
Do you understand the powerful effect that your food has on your mood? Food like Soul Food, that you think of as comfort food actually does little to comfort. While they may bring delight to your palate for a moment, they leave you feeling cramped, bloated, sluggish and these foods lead to inflammation in the joints which further leaves you feeling poorly. A diet rich in fruits and vegetables will leave you feeling light, energized and empowered knowing you are doing the right thing for your body. If you need help in knowing what to eat to energize you, improve your mood and reduce stress, get your hands on my book, 30 Days 30 Ways to Salad Heaven.
Gratitude
Listen, even in the hardest of times, God has been mmm mmm good to you. Think about how He’s provided for you. Thing about how He’s kept you. Think about how He’s empowered you to forgive those who have wronged you. Think about the beautiful friends and family He’s given you. Think about the talent He’s placed in you. There are so so many reasons to give thanks. So pause and reflect on His praiseworthy deeds and the mighty works of His hands and offer up a Thank You Lord! It will surely shift your focus off of your current stress and unto His goodness.
And I have so many others, I may have to do a Part 2. If you’d like to see a part two of this series leave me a comment. And also let me know how any of the above strategies have helped you manage stress.
While each of these suggestions may seem a small thing, when coupled together as part of your overall wellness protocol, they will yield a GREAT return. I pray your month is filled with God’s joy and His peace which surpasses all understanding.
As always, it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!
Coconut Chickpea Curry
Coconut chickpea curry, the spices make the dish fragrant and the coconut milk makes it luscious and creamy. This is sure to be a family crowd pleaser.
She’s Making Moves
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Sister Friend
I SEE YOU!
You’re making moves. On your job, in your home, and in your community.
Mom
Wife
Therapist
Group Leader
PTA President
Entrepreneur
And the greatest move of all, is what you are doing for the Kingdom. You are walking with God. You are standing on His word. Your allowing His word to be a lamp unto your feet and a light unto your path. You are walking in paths of righteousness for His namesake. You are being led by the spirit.
Indeed you are making moves Sis! I am so honored that day by day God makes His grace ABOUND toward me so that I am duly equipped (2 Corinthians 9:8) to make moves in my many spheres of influence.
But for those who know God has called you to make a move, yet you’ve stalled for whatever reason, let this serve as your catalyst. GET MOVING! And how can you get started?
- GET CLEAR – Carve out some time to clarify your mission and vision. Think through who you will serve and how you will serve them. Then narrow the scope. You may be gifted in many areas but what is the thing you are CALLED to do.
- WRITE IT OUT – Once you have a clear vision you must write it out. This helps to solidify the intent. As you’re writing things out, there will be action items and you’re more likely to carry them out if they’re written down.
For the rest of the steps, Join me over on SHE’S MAKING MOVES
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3 Step Easy Elderberry Syrup
Well, with five school aged children and a toddler who’s a thumb sucker, my crew has the potential to come into contact with lots of germies. So how do we keep our immune systems healthy and strong? We do that by eating lots of fruits and veggies, hand washing, exericse and getting adequate rest.
But to bolster our ability to fight off illness, we have another weapon in our arsenal.
Elderberry Syrup
As far back as Ancient Egypt, people have been using Elderberries as part of their wellness plan. Elderberries, also known as Sambucus, are used to treat a variety of ailments such as cold, fevers and nasal congestion.
Over the last few years I’ve been asked on many occasions my recipe for elderberry syrup so I’m finally taking an opportunity to write it down here for all my buddies who are looking for a recipe. Elderberry syrup can be purchased in your local natural food store but it’s just as easy to make and more cost effective to just whip up at batch since you may already have a few of the ingredients right at home.
Elderberry Syrup
1/2 cup dried elderberries
1 cinnamon stick
4 cloves
2 inch piece fresh ginger (peeled & sliced)
4 cups water
1/2 cup honey
Step 1
In a pot bring 4 cups water to boil. Add all ingredients except honey. Simmer on medium low for about 20 minutes or until liquid reduces by half.
Step 2
Remove from heat and strain.
Step 3
Add honey and stir well. Store in a mason jar in the fridge.
Here’s to keeping your family healthy and whole during cold and flu season.
As always, it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!
5 Steps For Reclaiming Your Health When You’ve Fallen Off The Wagon
All it takes is ONE thing.
Any.one.thing.
Working late one evening.
Extreme fatigue one day.
A phone call delivering bad news.
Then, you look up one day and realize you’ve fallen off the wagon.
But such is life right? Stops and starts and stops and starts again. Life can be cyclical like that at times. But just because you binged on those cookies doesn’t mean you cannot recover well. It does no good to swim in a sea of self-condemnation because all that will do is drive you into the arms of the next cookie; nor does it erase all the positive steps you made in seeking to honor your temple.
God saw you the day you kept walking past the office kitchen loaded with donuts. God saw you the day you chose the apple out of your purse instead of the candy from the vending machine. God saw you when you made it to your 6am bootcamp class when you wanted nothing more than to sleep late on that rainy morning.
And because God sees you and loves you, He’s willing to help you get back on track. All is not lost. Here’s the good news. Falling off isn’t fatal, it’s staying there that will cause you trouble. Now get up, dust yourself off and get back on it! When we fall, God is faithful to pick us up and set our feet on solid ground (Psalm 40:2).
Here are your 5 Steps For Reclaiming Your Health When You’ve Fallen Off The Wagon
Destroy The Idols & Repent
Anytime we allow anything to consume us, to become an elevated object of our affection or to replace the space devoted to God, we allow that thing to become an idol. And food surely has a way of becoming an idol. Slothfulness has a way of becoming an idol. Right now in Jesus’ name we bring destruction to anything we’ve allowed to become an idol. Repentance is our inward response to knowing we’ve done something offensive to God. It is when we own up to our wrongdoing and decide that we will turn away from it. So today we stand and declare that idols are eradicated and we repent for dishonoring our temples.
Forgive Yourself
The enemy of our souls seeks to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10) and as such seeks to rip you to shreds. He will play the highlight reel of every stumble you’ve ever had. He will keep reminding you, “Guilty, guilty, guilty!”
BUT GOD!
“So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.” Romans 8:1-2
So forgive yourself and silence the enemy. Jesus’ death presents you holy, without blemish and free from accusation (Colossians 1:22). There is freedom in forgiveness so forgive yourself as God forgives you.
Self Assess
So how did you fall off the wagon? Were you overworked and overwhelmed? Were your hormones out of whack? Assess how you got here. Are there any particular triggers, patterns or even times of year that contribute to you neglecting your health? I had some triggers this summer. You can read more of that HERE. Knowing how you got here can help you cut it off at the pass should you start leaning off the wagon.
Enlist Support
We are not made to traverse the rigors of life alone. Thus, it is crucial that we are in a supportive community that encourages us, teaches us AND holds us accountable. Where is that community for you? Well, you’ve got one RIGHT HERE. It is not easy when you go to work and there is sugar on your co-worker’s desk. It is not easy when the grocery store is mainly stocked with junk masquerading as food. It is not easy when you truly don’t have the energy and motivation to workout. It is not easy when you want to read a novel more than you want to read your bible. Argh! But that is exactly when community support kicks in, giving us the prod we need to stay on the right track. In community we sharpen one another (Proverbs 27:17), restore one another and bear each other’s burdens (Galatians 6:1-2).
Holistic Approach
Remember you are a triune being. You are a spirit, housed within a body, with a soul that allows you to engage with God’s creation. Thus any plan for honoring your health has to be a holistic one. You must nurture your spirit, nourish your body and regulate your soul. To neglect any one of these areas is to neglect them all.
By employing the above steps, I’m certain you’ll be riding high on the wellness wagon. Let me know in the comments which step you might find challenging so that I can pray with you.
“Don’t you know that your body is a sanctuary of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought at a price. Therefore glorify God in your body.” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20
For DAILY inspiration be sure you’re following me on FB & on IG
As always, it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!
How Toni’s Morrison’s Words Influence My Parenting
Toni Morrison
“It’s interesting to see when a kid walks into the room… does your face light up? That’s what they’re looking for…when my children used to walk in the room when they were little, I looked at them to see if they had buckled their trousers or if their hair was combed or their socks were up…so you think your affection and your deep love is on display cause you’re caring for them, it’s not. When they see you they see the critical face…what’s wrong now? …But then if you let your face speak what’s in your heart. Because when they walked in the room I was glad to see them. It’s just as small as that, you see.”
Nobel laureate and novelist, Toni Morrison shared these deep yet simply stated musings on an episode of Oprah’s Lifeclass. So eloquently she illustrated the difference between meeting temporal needs and maximizing on the opportunity to connect with the heart. Oprah went on to say that one of her own biggest learning lessons of the early 90’s was that the common denominator in the human experience is that everyone wants to be appreciated or validated.
And don’t we see that in our world today? The rash brazenness of broken people intent on hurting themselves and others because they long to be seen, to be known, to be validated, and to be loved.
And oh how many times I’ve missed the mark on this. But watching this segment left an indelible mark on me, raising my awareness of SEEING my children. Morrison captures the essence of it because truly much of parental life is consumed with meeting temporal needs which can suffocate connection. Endless piles of laundry, shuttling children to and from activities, cooking meals, you know the drill.
The job of parenting finds us doing seemingly important things for our children but we don’t want to miss out on the needed thing. Just as Jesus affirmed that Mary had chosen the better part, let us choose the better part and that is connecting with the hearts of our children. Doing so demands that we slow down.
The human heart craves connection and we must make ourselves available for our children.
How available are you if your face is planted in an electronic device when your child is trying to talk to you? How available are you when you an inundated with 2 million worries because that stack of medical bills keeps getting higher and higher?
This is when you have to cast all your cares on God and eliminate distractions so that you make yourself available for connection. Connection is carried out through communication. It is imperative that you communicate in ways that your child can perceive and receive. Be sure to check out 5 Ways To Communicate With Your Child Better.
Love sees and love notices and love cares. When a pregnant Hagar attempted to flee because of Sarai’s cruelty, she had an encounter with el-Roi, The God Who Sees. Not only did the angel of the Lord see her there, he blessed her. Just as God saw Hagar sitting there, He sees you and He sees your children. Yup, that’s what love does; love sees. Our children, in their own unique way are crying out, “Do you see me?” And in return, it is not the critical face, the glare or the correction of external trappings that I want to offer. I want them to see my face light up.
“It’s just as small as that you see.”
Some of the thoughts shared in this post are adapted from my book, Purposeful Parenting. Be sure to pick up a copy for yourself or one for a friend.
As always it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!
5 Ways To Communicate With Your Child Better
You know the old saying. Perhaps your mama said it or your grandma said it or the mean ole lady next door said it to your mama about you,
“Children should be seen and not heard!”
Which is really ridiculous because this statement implies that children should not be SEEN or HEARD. And I don’t know about you, but I believe part of the reason the world is so jacked up today is because we’ve got adult “children” running around today who are broken; they weren’t seen or heard and their behavior is a cry to be noticed.
But can we just give a holla and a hand clap that we are empowered to parent as we see fit. While mama & ‘nem gave us some fundamental tools that have helped us become successful, today we can keep, adapt, modify or even discard some of the things we saw and heard in our childhood.
Let’s be clear, children should be SEEN and HEARD.
The heart of every human craves connection. And when connection is stifled, it will manifest in a myriad of unpleasant ways. So let’s cut that off at the pass and be purposeful in connecting with our children. And one of the primary ways we connect hearts is through open, loving communication. So here are 5 ways you can communicate better with your child starting today.
To get the 5 tips, join me over @ Mommifaceted.
As always, it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully even in your parenting!
How to Stay Committed When Giving Up Seems So Much Easier
“Oh no, oh no, oh no!”, I said to myself as I went to plug my external payment device into my phone. I was setting up to vend at an event and lo and behold I found myself between a rock and a hard place. I forgot that my new phone was not compatible with the reader.
Now earlier that day I had already experienced the AC failing on me while driving in 90 degree weather, driving 55 miles to and from dropping my children off so I could attend this event and the car not starting up after I stopped to get cash.
So when I came upon this challenge I was nearly undone. But I held my resolve. I grabbed my keys and drove to the nearest mobile phone store. They had the adapter but it was grossly overpriced. So I proceeded to the nearest five and dime as my grandma would call it. Much to my delight they had the adapter.
Sweaty with no AC but adapter in hand I raced back to the event. I was looking forward to sharing the hope of my book, Purposeful Parenting with this church full of mothers. I plugged in the adapter, and…..nothing.
That’s right. NOTHING. IT.DID.NOT.WORK.
“Forget it, I’ll just pack up and go home,” I told myself because in that moment giving up was so much easier. I had had ENOUGH!
“This is ridiculous.”
“I can’t do this.”
“Why God?”
My internal rant was quickly getting the best of me until God spoke. “Are you committed?”
To which I responded with my continued internal temper tantrum. And very lovingly He asked me again, “Are you committed?”
Feeling dejected, I took a walk to the restroom to mull over the question. As I let a tear slip from my eye, I was wracked with frustration for being willing to give up so easy because being committed in the hard spaces was not new to me.
Two months into my 1st year of college my mother died suddenly. I went back to my home state to regroup but one month later I returned to school. The very next year, mother’s younger brother died. I was ravaged with hurt but I persevered. The very next year, my mother’s sister, the aunt with whom I used to live died also. Back to back to back; mama, uncle, auntie, all gone. But my commitment remained.
So staring into the face of my current “wanna give up”, I was sandwich between tenacity and grit. With my feet firmly planted on the Chief Cornerstone, coupled with a Phone-A-Friend, I decided to stay committed. I decided to not give up when in that moment giving up felt like it would have been so much easier.
And may your hearts be fully committed to the LORD our God. 1 Kings 8:61a
A sweet sister in Christ, Linda Mendable told me when giving up seems easier than staying committed you’ve got to have Great Resolve In Turbulence, GRIT.
There’s no way around it. Carrying out your kingdom mandate is going to be tough. You will face situations where giving up seems so much easier. But during these times I encourage you to remember, GOD IS THERE!
And not only is He there, He loves you. And not only does He love you, He believes in you. And not only does He believe in you, He’s empowering you by way of the Holy Spirit within you. You have proven yourself faithful, so He’s committed great works into your care.
So how do we stay committed?
- You have to remember that God is for you. Even when the situation doesn’t feel good to your flesh, He’s working it together for your good.
- Look for God in the situation. Ask Him, “What am I supposed to learn from this?”
- Remember your “why”.
- Positive self-talk. Tell yourself, “You can!” “You will!”
- Phone-A-Friend. When in crisis, send out an SOS.
You have to be committed to what has been committed into your care and custody. God has placed special things in your trust, to be kept, guarded, protected, developed and eventually disseminated so that it will reproduce after its own kind.
What has He committed into your care?
- Financial Blessings
- Children
- Leadership
- Spiritual Gifts
- Artistic Abilities
Giving up might seem easier in the moment but staying committed will reap great dividends for the kingdom.
Commit your activities to the LORD, and your plans will be achieved. Proverbs 16:3
As always, it is my prayer that you’ve been Inspired To Live Fully!
